Summary of the Key Points
This article exposes the exploitative nature of the parenting blogger industry: most bloggers take advantage of the anxiety of new parents by spreading unverified “pseudo-knowledge” to promote products and make money. It also offers five practical suggestions to help parents overcome their anxiety: trust in your child’s adaptability, avoid excessive pressure on them, prioritize building a strong parent-child relationship, respect their feelings, and understand that the essence of parenting is companionship, not material possessions.
1. Why can parenting bloggers say whatever they want? Because their “target audience” can’t argue back
Parenting bloggers have a unique advantage: their direct audience (children) either can’t speak or don’t have access to the internet to challenge their claims; their indirect audience (parents) are often new to parenting and lack both experience and the ability to question these suggestions. Unlike financial bloggers who can face market setbacks (such as stock price drops that may lead to followers unfollowing them), it’s difficult to immediately prove that the methods or products recommended by parenting bloggers, such as “special pillows for perfect head shapes” or “prone sleeping to promote independence,” are ineffective. Even if they later turn out to be useless, the bloggers have already made money from traffic and product sales. Ironically, many parenting bloggers have only raised one or two children but still claim to be experts, which is just as ridiculous as someone claiming to be a “master investor” after buying just one stock.
2. Children are more resilient than you think; much of the anxiety is unfounded
Children’s adaptability and ability to recover from setbacks far exceed parents’ expectations. For example, catching a cold won’t affect their health in the long term, and missing hair at the back of the head isn’t due to calcium deficiency (vitamin D supplementation will fix it). Whether a child uses a pillow or sleeps barefoot/padded shoes is only short-term influential. The author’s own experience illustrates this: she bought a bunch of parenting products for her daughter but never used them, and her daughter grew up healthy and happy. The key is to recognize that if a parenting suggestion makes you feel guilty or pressured into buying expensive products, it’s likely a sales tactic. What truly matters is the child’s comfort.
3. Avoid excessive pressure on children; development milestones are not as important as their natural abilities
New parents often compare their children to standards outlined in “parenting guides.” But the author questions: “A healthy first-grader can walk, and adults can add one plus one—what difference does it make if they learn a bit earlier or later?” His daughter didn’t like eating or was poor at sports, but he realized it was due to genetics. He realized that as long as she was well-nourished and happy, the specifics of her diet (such as eating crown daisy or sweet potato leaves) or athletic performance were not crucial. Before pushing your child, ask yourself: “Am I capable of doing what I’m asking my child to do?” Don’t impose on them what you don’t want for yourself.
4. The parent-child relationship is the foundation; parenting skills are secondary
Many parents learn various parenting techniques but forget that the core is a strong bond with their child. If your child doesn’t trust or feel close to you, they’ll dismiss your advice as if it came from a stranger. For example, would you listen to someone who taught you basketball by simply saying “jump and shoot when the defender falls?” The same goes for parenting: approach problems from your child’s perspective. If your child is afraid of a slide, play with them first before gradually letting them go, rather than scolding them as a “coward.” Without a strong relationship, no parenting skills will be effective.
5. The purpose of parenting is to support growth, not to buy things for your own satisfaction
Many parents think buying expensive items means being good for their children—selecting prestigious kindergartens, buying luxury clothing, or enrolling them in the most expensive tutoring classes. But children don’t understand these things; what they care about is comfort. For example, the author criticized a friend who chose a kindergarten based on its name rather than its quality, and someone who gave a 2-year-old child a high-end graphics card was merely satisfying their own vanity. The purpose of parenting is to support your child’s growth, not to use money as a way to feel accomplished (e.g., “I’ve done my best; if they don’t do well, it’s their fault.” Spending money doesn’t mean the child will feel loved; it can lead to the opposite effect.
Final Reminder
While parenting bloggers’ knowledge can be helpful, it’s limited. The key is to develop your own approach: trust in your child, focus on building a strong relationship with them, and respect their feelings. Don’t let anxiety control you. Parenting is a journey; the process is more important than the outcome.